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On Being “Socialized as a Male”
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If someone says that I have been “socialized as a male” they usually mean that social forces are so powerful that my brain has been formed into being a man’s brain. Therefore, any patriarchy or toxic masculinity conditioned into cis men has also been conditioned into transfemmes to a similar degree. And that any…
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Mysticism and the Art of Genderfuckery
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I was never very good at being a boy. Boys are supposed to like sports and hunting and engine grease and playing with trucks. Not girly things like dolls and home decoration and fashion and playing with an easy bake oven. Boys are flannel and denim and dirt under their nails. Girls are satin…
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Changing Yourself to Find Your Self: Reflections on Judgement and Gender Expression
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As I continue in my process of gender transition, I’m asking myself what I want to change about myself and why. Criticism and judgement abounds in our society—animated by both the soul-less force of consumer capitalism and the toxic religiosity of Christian supremacy. Ours is a performance culture, were we are often made to…
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Vexing the Vainglorious Ashe Van S.
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If you follow me on social media, you may have noticed that I’ve been very vulnerable about my transition in ways that many (if not most) people could find awkward. When I started my transition, I committed to do so publicly. I’ve shared pictures of myself trying to look pretty. I’ve made videos addressing…